15 Best Lesbian Sex Toys 2023

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Sex educators and gender specialists helped us pick the top vibrators, dildos and strap-ons.

Forget Barry White. When it comes to sexual pleasure — whether it's solo or with a partner — the right sex toy can get things heated up, real fast. Fortunately, the industry doesn't discriminate against those in the lesbian community because there are plenty that are designed by women and for lesbian couples.

And this accessibility means more than just a greater proportion of women being able to achieve toe-curling orgasms — sex toys can offer queer people creative ways to define what their unique likes are, outside a sex culture which highly centers penetration and climax as the only means and end.

"Sex and self-pleasure [with sex toys] for queer women can be very deeply affirming of their identity, especially if someone is just starting to explore that part of themselves," says Rae McDaniel, MEd, LCPC, a certified sex therapist and the author of Gender Magic.

As you explore sex toys, you might discover that "sometimes self-pleasure is exploration without orgasm and there is great benefit to that as well," Celina Gomes, a certified sex educator and pleasure mentor. "Just spending more time becoming more familiar with our bodies, being kind to ourselves with caring touch can make us feel more connected and safer existing in them when society is going to lengths to cause so much harm [in the queer community]."

Using sex toys can improve your health, too. For example, sexual pleasure can help to release feel-good chemicals such as oxytocin, and help to reduce anxiety and stress. This can lead to better sleep, pain-relief and increased libido, according to the Cleveland Clinic.

Overall, while you’re shopping, "the important mindset to go in with is experimentation and play," says McDaniel. "There's no wrong answer. If you get something and you don't like it, that's just data in discovering what you do like."

Now go on with your lovely self and choose your own adventure with these best sex toys for lesbians.

This harness is made out of machine-washable, breathable materials (nylon and spandex), which means it's super practical and soft to the touch. It has two adjustable straps, making it easy for you to fit it to your body shape and size. Plus: it can slip on and off very easily, just like a pair of underwear. The Joque harness accommodates dildos ranging from 1.10 to 2.25 inches in diameter. And "what's nice about this harness is that there's two little pockets for bullet vibrators," says Kassel. "So that means the person who's receiving the dildo can be teased and stimulated while the person who is wearing the harness can be stimulated and teased, too." It can even accommodate double dildos if you and your partner would like to experience penetration simultaneously.

Watch out! You might end up ditching your traditional vibrators for this one, which has thousands of 5-star reviews. Made of super smooth, body safe silicone, it is waterproof and USB-rechargeable. It may be small, but with the five speed settings it has available, the sensations can get pretty intense, says Gomes."I’ve used many clit stimulating toys, but Puff is the all around winner for me," adds Gomes. "Its shape makes it really easy to hold and maneuver. And it's hands down the most affordable bang for your buck clit stimulator out there. I sometimes still can't believe it's so affordable because the orgasms it delivers can be wild!"

For double the penetrative fun, the Fun Factory Share could be a very exciting choice for you and your partner. This velvety silicone dildo is designed to curve against the wearer's G-spot and stay there as they pleasure their partner's inner sweet spots. This makes it a "strapless" dildo, which can feel amazing. The thing is: "It can take a lot of pelvic floor strength and coordination to keep the dildo in on the wearer's side," says Kassel. In that case, you may want to use the aid of a strap on — which you would have to purchase separately — in certain positions. For some gender-nonconforming folks, this dildo can be very gender-affirming — with or without a partner.

This comes in real handy when you want to stimulate both your clitoris and your inner hotspots. The external arm has seven intensity settings (five patterns) and its flexibility allows you to find the best angle for your body. Meanwhile, the internal arm has five separate thrust intensities (and five patterns). The best part: You can control each of these features independently giving you 120 different combinations of pleasure."I can't get enough of this toy because of its ergonomic handle and beautiful thrusting power," says Gomes. "Because the toy is designed so well, I am able to really immerse myself in the experience."

With many colors to choose from — like cashew, caramel, hazelnut and chocolate — this brand gives you the opportunity to select a dildo that matches the skin tone of your choice.

It also "has a pliable silicone core, which allows it to bend during penetration so it's more likely to hit the different hotspots in the vaginal canal," says Kassel. The flexible nature of this dildo means you can simply wear it, too, according to Wet For Her, making it a very versatile toy for trans, gender-fluid and non-binary folks as well.

In case you want to explore a different way to "strap on" or the typical stirrups don't work for you or your partner — say if hip motions aren't accessible or comfortable — This is a great alternative. The thigh strap-on is made of a soft, stretchy material called neoprene (which is machine washable, yay!) and is designed to fit "all bodies" of various types of mobility, according to the brand. The 1.75" nitrile O-ring can hold smaller to fairly large dildos, but customers suggest using those that have a flared base, otherwise they’ll slip out.Overall, it's "a great option for folks looking to up their grinding or humping experience," according to Javay Frye-Nekrasova, MEd, a Lovehoney sex educator and content creator. "You can add penetration to a tribbing or scissoring session with ease." This strap-on even makes hands-free, solo play possible as you can strap it to a firm pillow.

The Moxie+ is a wearable vibrator that can fit right in your underwear. You can control it with the remote control or on the app, giving you the opportunity to explore some solo, hands-free pleasure whenever and wherever.For partners, the Moxie+ two vibrator set is well-suited for long-distance lovemaking. And it's "a great option for discreet public play and teasing, says Frye-Nekrasova. "Both partners can play with each other at the same time with the app or the remote control. This is a great toy for building anticipation because you can use it without ever actually touching each other and can focus on building up the excitement for when you do touch."

Save these for the next time you and/or your partner are in the mood for a little more kink. Vampire gloves may look a little scary, but the soft buttery leather can feel nice on the skin, says McDaniel, while the pokey stubs can add an interesting contrast if you’re into that kind of external sensory play. "As long as you’re using [these gloves] gently and not poking really hard, they are not going to pierce the skin," says McDaniel.By the way, this variety comes in four different sizes (small, medium, large and XL) allowing people of varying hand sizes to use them.

We-Vibe is one of the most reputable brands on the market, having been in the business for over a decade. Their Touch X is made of soft and plush silicone that is waterproof and easy to clean. Thanks to its intuitive design, you can easily click through eight of its different vibration intensities and seven of its vibrational patterns (the cha-cha is a fan favorite). Users say it's a quiet and powerful tool that's so discreet it can fit snugly into your hand.

RodeoH makes all sorts of underwear-style harnesses for various gender expressions. So whether you want boxer, brief or panty harnesses, RodeoH's got you covered — literally. "What's nice about these options is that they cover more skin than a strap style harness would," says Kassel. "So for a person who does not want their genitals or butt visible to their partner, they are a really awesome option."

These boxers are affordable, comfortable and machine-washable with a 1.65" O-ring which fits many dildo sizes. They can also be worn underpants like regular underwear. So if you are going to something like a play party, or you are traveling to see your partner, you’ll be ready to go when things get hot.

The magic behind this medical-grade silicone wand is its incredible adaptability. The bulbed head is large enough that it can stimulate both the clitoris and the vulva, and the flexible neck allows you to bend the bulb to the angle of your liking and ergonomic needs. "The thing I like most about it is that the actual wand part curves with your body so much better than just a straight wand," says McDaniel.You can choose from a variety of vibrational patterns and intensities, too. If you like it more on the intense side, Dame Toys claims the Com has "their most powerful motor yet." Users say it brings an intense-enough gratification without the loud, vibe-killing buzz.

Stainless steel sex toys are great for those who like a firmer dildo with a little more weight to them. You can use them for a vaginal massage or to ready intimate areas for larger toys, according to Kassel. Plus they are incredibly easy to clean with soap and water, in the dishwater, or in a boiling pot of water. Perhaps what makes them the most interesting is the ability to play around with temperature. "You can stick the stainless steel toy in the freezer ahead of play and use it to help you or your partner experience different sensations," says Kassel.

Like stainless steel varieties, glass dildos are really easy to clean and lend well to temperature play. For example, glass dildos hold on to heat very well, according to Kassel. You can dip a glass dildo in a bowl of warm water for a few minutes and use it for foreplay.

"Those who may experience pain during penetration or have a hard time getting in the mood for sex, a warm glass dildo can help increase blood flow and start the arousal process," says Kassel.

As a result, "they are more likely to become lubricated and experience pleasure." This glass dildo has a minimalist design with thick nubs and spiraled ridges to massage all of your internal curves. Most users say it's study, affordable and totally worth a try.

When you’re just starting out with sex toy shopping, you don't necessarily want to break the bank trying something you may or may not like, says Gabrielle Kassel, a sex educator and journalist. So, this $35 option is a great place to start if you’re wondering if G-spot stimulation is for you. The Yummy Sunshine Vibrator comes in a bright yellow that invites play and curiosity, and it's made of skin-friendly waterproof silicone. "It's also a good option for folks who generally don't like high intensity vibrators," adds Kassel. "It starts at a level that is often described as ‘buzzy,’ which means it's a less intense vibration and moves up to a moderate intensity. You can also use this one externally so the versatility is what makes it great for beginners and those on a budget."

If you’re curious about butt play but are afraid of purchasing something too large, you may appreciate this product from B-Vibe. This vibrating butt plug is about the size of a finger, making it more suitable for those new to anal play. With the accompanying remote, you can change between the six different intensity levels from up to 30-feet away. "So if you are out with a partner, that can be a fun thing to have" for discreet public play, says McDaniel. The novice can be used in the vagina as a hands-free vibrator. But if you’ve used it anally, wash it thoroughly with antibacterial soap first.

We spoke with self-identifying queer sex educators and gender specialists for their recommendations on the top toys for solo play and couples. We also made sure to feature brands that are reputable and regarded in the sex toy industry. On top of that, we read reviews from actual users on the sites for real feedback on the products.

✔️ Look for toys made of non-porous material. "Non-porous means the toy does not have those tiny microscopic holes where bacteria can live," says Kassel. "With non-porous toys — like body-safe silicone, glass, and stainless steel — you can wash it off and it's totally sterile for use."

✔️ Don't look for rock-bottom prices. "If the price is too good to be true, it probably isn't safe enough for your body, or it will diminish in quality pretty quickly," says Gomes. "If you want an affordable toy, purchase it directly from a sex shop. Usually sex shop staff [whether online or in person] will be able to guide you to products in your budget."

✔️ Get the appropriate lube for you and your toy. Lube can certainly add more comfort to your experience, but make sure to get a lube that gets along with the toy you’re using, says Kassel. For example, a silicone lube will stick to your silicone toys and warp the shape forever! Water and oil-based lubes are best for silicone toys, while silicone can work on steel and glass. Also, read the ingredient labels. "Try to shoot for lube that has the fewest ingredients and ones you can actually pronounce," says McDaniel. "We don't want things in or around our bodies that are not good for us."

"After use, wash them with warm water and a gentle liquid soap; this can help prevent infection-causing bacteria from lingering," Suki Dunham, founder and CEO of OhMiBod, previously told us for another sex toy article.

The author of this story, Adele Jackson-Gibson, is a freelance journalist who has 8 years of experience writing, editing, and reporting. Her main beat is health and fitness and she has work published in Prevention, Good Housekeeping, The Nike Coaching Journal, Oprah Daily, and SELF. Adele identifies as queer and for this story she researched and/or demoed dozens of toys, read countless customer reviews, and interviewed queer sex educators. Stephanie Dolgoff, the deputy director of the health group for Good Housekeeping, edited this story. She has covered women's sexual health and sexuality for more than three decades, including many years writing about sex toys for such publications as Glamour, SELF and Cosmopolitan.

Adele Jackson-Gibson is a certified fitness coach, model, and writer. She earned her master's in Journalism from NYU, her bachelor's in Literature from Yale University, and has since written for various sports, fitness, beauty, and culture outlets.

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